An artistic legacy doing good things
Have you ever felt just discouraged?
Just exhausted. As if all your energy had been swept clean of your body and all that it can do now is to slide on the ground and stay still, its back again the rotating earth.
I can see all the things, coming one after another, surrounding and imposing on my mind. I wish I could pile it on in a beach somewhere. From the taxes to the dirty dishes. Add the always empty Oyster card and late tube trains. Throw in the emails from the letting agency and their ever changing rules. And complete with the health insurance trimester invoice.
And then, set it on fire.
This a strange state mind. It is not sad, it is nothing. It just is I guess.
All I know is that this would burn well, a Bonfire with a capital B. The acrid smoke would probably make me cough. But, even if i could not actually breathe, it would make it all easier to breathe anyway.
Today, it rained. First summer rain after a week and a half of drought. It poured with a vengeance for a little while. So, I stuck my feet through the window, abandoning my work to feel the rain. It tickled as it went down my legs and my feet. And it felt wonderful. Made me forget for a little while, that Time was fleeing away, and that tomorrow, I will probably regret letting it flow through my toes.
Time is a fickle thing. And, I had never seen that as much as during this past month. Day by day, my grandfather has been vanishing a little more. The illness he has is catching up and the stroke he had two weeks ago damaged his brain. Nowadays, there is not any past or present anymore for him. The timeline has twisted upon itself, the circle of life has been warped into a resting eight. In one day, he travels faster and farther than anyone's wildest dream, mixing friends from his youth and persons he just met, cities he has not been in thirty years to places he has never been. It is both surreal and fantastic. When past and present disappear, the existence of the future does not matter so much. As long as each minute is full of kindness, it does not really matter for him, I guess. And it should not bother us too much too, I guess.Times flies away, and yet, it stands still inside our brains. And it is probably the only time machine we will ever need.
And time is claiming the last remnants of energy keeping me on the keyboard. I am not sure where this was supposed to end. Or if it was leading anywhere to begin. After all, Midnight is already gone as well as the time for strange thoughts and ponderings.
Sweet dreams everyone.